Cecilia Nordenstam Is Average

Cecilia Nordenstam at the 2009 WSOP Main Event

Cecilia Nordenstam is just your average Swedish girl.

Above is Cecilia Nordenstam. She hails from Sweden. In U.S. America, guys would cut off their left arm for just one night with a girl like Cecilia. But in Sweden, where they actually kill you if you’re among the 10% of the population who are not attractive*, Cecilia is just kind of average. She’s just your average Swedish model (models make up almost 74% of the total female Swedish population**).

While we’re on the subject, here are some other facts about Sweden:

  • Sweden is called “The land of the midnight sun” or “The land of the Vikings”.
  • Girls in Sweden are all morally casual and are into oral on the first date and anal on the second.
  • The Swedish Parliament is called Riksdag and is situated in Stockholm.
  • Everyone in Sweden is attractive and if they are not, they are murdered in public, then burned while the crowd chants “dö häxa!” (die witch)
  • Elections to the Riksdag are held regularly on the third Sunday of September every four years.
  • The Swedes are known for their neutrality except in matters of killing their unattractive countrymen.
  • Sweden is divided into of a number of counties (län). The sole purpose of the counties is local administration.
  • Relatedly, the sole purpose of the local administration is to determine beauty and conduct public execution of the “ohygglig” (hideous).
  • About 88 % of the population in Sweden belong to the Swedish church, which is a Lutheran Church.
  • Often times if it is too “köld” (cold) outside, the Swedes will “take care of” their “ohygglig” in trendy night clubs with trance music where “het kandisockren” (hot chocolate) is served.
  • The Swedish write their dates in the form: YYYY-MM-DD. For example, July 6, 2009 would be written 2009-07-06.
  • Seven of the “ohygglig” were “taken care of” on 2009-07-06.
  • The head of the Swedish government is the Prime Minister.
  • Roger Federer is the current Swedish Prime Minister.
  • Sweden has a national police force.
  • The national police are mostly used to ballboy tennis matches.

Unfortunately we didn’t get the time to post this while Cecilia was still alive in the 2009 WSOP Main Event. After nearly doubling her stack early in play, she was eliminated later on Day 1D. Go below for more pics of Cecilia playing poker.

* Unsubstantiated.
** Could be off by a few percentage points.

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12 Responses

  1. Daniel

    July 8, 2009 1:41 am, Reply

    Haha, just great! Cecilia is hot but its true that she is kind of average in in Sweden. So many beautiful girls! Funny facts too. I guess you had to put in Roger Federer there so the usual Sweden/Switzerland thing got in too =)

    /Daniel from Sweden

  2. Henrik

    July 8, 2009 3:52 am, Reply

    haha.. great stuff =D

    Agree with Daniel I would put hur at average.. but alittle above though. Were lucky, most of the girls here are really cute!

    And ofcourse we do the public execution things….. But no one dares write anything about it since everyone secretly believes that we are doing the right thing! 😀

  3. ozzy

    July 8, 2009 4:22 am, Reply

    Cecila is not average in my book, she’s the hottest girl in sweden. Well, I think she’s the hottest girl in the world. Beauty and brains. The complete package.

  4. Sophie from Sweden

    July 8, 2009 6:43 am, Reply

    Well, most of the guys and the lesbian girls in sweden would say that shes average. I think shes more ugly than hot. Well anyway, love the text its hilarious :)

  5. Jay

    July 8, 2009 7:46 am, Reply

    And another fact is that all girls in sweden always complain about eachothers look and mostly over internet because that is the least threatening way for themselves.

    plus I love the google translations haha

  6. PJ

    July 19, 2009 3:17 am, Reply

    I live in sweden, and if I were single i would probably do her in a heartbeat.
    Like adde from swe wrote, she is WAAAY way over average and pretty damn fine.. We have a lot of dogs in sweden aswell.. Obv they are murdered in public.
    Funny article though!

  7. Rikard

    September 29, 2009 2:16 pm, Reply

    Nice one, but what is “het kandisockren”? never heard of it (i think) and I am a swede. That girl was okey I guess… 5-6 of 10 (say Alba or Fox).

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