Cover Your Raise with Kimono Condoms

KimonochipKimonogirl

Snake: Chops, u ever see this commercial?

Chops: No.

Snake: Got anything funny to say about it?

Chops: Hmm, I can’t think of any implied poker terminology that would be appropriate here.

Raise?

All-in?

Big Stack?

None work in this context.

Snake: Yeh I’m stumped too. Hey, don’t the actors kind of look like porn stars? I mean the cheesy string bettin dude who goes all in has a ponytail. Isn’t there a classic Socratic syllogism that goes:

All actors who have ponytails are porn stars.
This actor has a ponytail.
This actor is a porn star.

Chops: I’m not sure what male porn stars look like from the waist up.

Snake: Hey get this, the president of this condom company says, “Kimono is the choice for sophisticated young-adults; an important part of their wardrobe is the condom they wear.”

Chops: You know, I was wondering when wearing a condom as an accessory would catch on. Been doing it for years. Hopefully the same will happen soon for my next favorite dick accessory, the cock-ring.

Snake: Btw, I’m using this email exchange for the post, in lieu of giving any more details about this ad..

Cool?

Chops: Daddy likey.

I’m “Daddy” in the context of the above sentence, fyi.

Use that, it’s gold.

And use the fact that I said, “Use that, it’s gold.”

It’s gold.

 

6 Responses

  1. Bones

    February 16, 2006 12:52 pm, Reply

    I used to have a pony tail, and I was in drama club in high school. So, as long as the size of your dong isn’t a variable, I guess I used to be a porn star. I bet I really enjoyed it, too. Thanks Wicked Chops Poker!

  2. snake

    February 16, 2006 1:20 pm, Reply

    yeh i know…its a bit of a flawed syllogism as Lorenzo Lamas always had a pony tail and he didnt do porn./ altho he isn’t much of an actor either. perhaps all actors who have ponytails are bad actors and/or do porn. Seems to work. I mean you had a ponytail and acted in high school yet don’t act now. so that means you must have been a bad actor…or did porn.
    as far as chops tells me, dong size isn’t a variable.

  3. Bones

    February 16, 2006 2:17 pm, Reply

    Snake, I’m afraid you’re correct: I was a bad actor with a bad ponytail and my only co-star in my porn career was a box of Kleenex.
    So, in conclusion, I think this means your syllogism is legitimate.
    I’m glad we had this discussion. I think…

  4. snake

    February 16, 2006 2:36 pm, Reply

    and since we’re talking porn the new Scott Sapp (i think he was some Jesus like character in a bad 90s rock band that released the same song, disguised as a different song, over and over to radio) and Kid Rock sex tape is out.
    Boy that sounds fantastic. Sapp and Kid together on one sex tape.
    Alrighty.
    check out a quasi NSFW clip here and puke in your mouth when Scott says its great to be king.

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