Congrats guys! You made Erica’s Top 10 Fashion Mistakes Men Make at the Poker Table List.
We’re not ones to talk fashion here at Wicked Chops Poker but ridiculously gorgeous poker pro Erica Schoenberg was kind enough to share exclusively with us her top 10 fashion mistakes men make at the poker table, and as a public service to our readers who may have the fashion sensibilities of a Todd Brunson, or who went to the University of Florida, we thought we’d pass ’em on.
So what makes Erica an expert on the subject? Let’s just say the girl knows fashion like her boyfriend David Benyamine knows his way around whatever the French word is for buffet. Whether she’s out on the town in Las Vegas or seated amongst schlubs at the poker table, Erica is oozing with style, perhaps more than any other girl in poker. Except for maybe Lynette Chan. Hard to top Lynette Chan.
So, here are
10. When a man wears Birkenstocks or other “mandals” it’s generally a fashion don’t. The reason being most men don’t get regular pedicures or take good care of their feet; therefore they are just exposing gnarly, hairy and often crusty heels and toes. Ewwwwww.
9. Spandex. Unless you are in the Tour de France there is never a reason for this material to ever touch a man’s body.
8. Jeans that are either way too big or painfully too tight. Can’t you guys find a happy medium between wanna be rapper and “I got these jeans really tight so you could see my package”???
7. Denim shorts. NEVER. EVER.
6. This seems fairly obvious, but I do tend to see this amazingly bad look on older gentlemen – black socks and white tennis shoes. I usually just assume that the offender’s wife has just given up by this point.
5. #5 is also a look favored mostly by the Euro crowd, and again, they should lose it – capris. If the name alone doesn’t deter any normal hetero male from wearing what is essentially just a pair of short pants, well, we probably can’t help them.
4. #4 on the list is most commonly made by European men – the white belt/white dress shoe combo. This double-punch fashion-don’t just screams “I am either Norwegian or Scandinavian and I also wear a Speedo at the beach”. Nuff’ said.
3. Another common mistake in the shirt department is wearing a size medium tee shirt when you’re clearly a double XL. Listen, I’ve done it before (bought and worn those size two jeans when I’m really a size four), however, not only is it uncomfortable, but very, very unsightly.
2. I love to see men wearing something nice, like a button down dress shirt. What I don’t love, however, is when said shirt is unbuttoned to the navel. That is, unless you look like David Beckham and, well…you don’t.
1. Wearing a tank top or a white Hanes style undershirt (also known as a “wifebeater”) to play poker. I guarantee you not one person at the table wants to look at your nipples or your armpits.
“After reading my list you’ve probably realized that you, a poker playing male, have committed one or more of these fashion crimes, however…don’t be too discouraged!” says Erica. “I’m not hatin’ – I’m datin’- David Benyamine, that is, a repeat offender of the aforementioned list! So use this list as guideline and nothing more. Remember, your girlfriend or wife probably didn’t choose you because of your keen sense of style!”