For One Day, Forget Poker. Time to Hunker Down.

Gat_1Chops here.

DAWGS.

Two weeks ago, Snake had his big rivalry weekend.  This week, it‚Äôs my team‚Äîthe DAWGS‚Äîas we engage in the world‚Äôs biggest annual cocktail party. 

That‚Äôs right.  Tomorrow, all thoughts of pot odds, pressure bets, and position will be put aside as I watch my DAWGS hunker down against those cheesy-ass Florida Gators.

I could sit here and make obvious gator-hater jokes.  But we all know Gators wear jean shorts.  And why keep piling on a University that offers airbrushed diplomas.  Like girls who go to UF, it‚Äôd be just too easy. 

Oh, there are people who doubt the DAWGS.  No doubt that after Shockley went down, those mulletheads at UF started getting their hopes up.  I can just see it‚Ķthere’s Terry and Ricky driving in their Mustang, cracking open a Natty Light, discussing how the Gators would surely defeat a depleted DAWGS squad.  So to Terry, Ricky, and all of you other Gator fans, DAWGS nation only has one thing to say to you:

Antigator_1

Sure, Shockley‚Äôs loss is big.  But this is the DAWGS we‚Äôre talking about!  We‚Äôre not Ole Miss, Tennessee, or Vandy.  We‚Äôre the fucking DAWGS, man!!!

People are forgetting about our dominating D, our punishing running attack, and the steady influence of one Mark Richt.  And with Chris Leak constantly wetting the bed in Urban Meyer‚Äôs system, do you really think the Gators have that big of an advantage over our Joe Tereshinski III

If you‚Äôre a DAWGS fan, it’s freaking time to get pumped.  The DAWGS are winning this game.  Fellow DAWGS alumnus Dave ‚ÄúThe Cop‚Äù put it best in an email this morning:

    Gentlemen,

    The Joking is over. What I mean at this point is all business. You may be asking yourself, "But Dave, there always time for fun." Well, if that‚Äôs your attitude then I suggest you take a worm for a walk week. I found myself sitting in a Mickey D’s this morning reading an article about my new favorite Dawg, Joe T. At one point I got so pumped I let out a yelp. It was sort of a loud "yes" but not really. I hope each one of you is as pumped as I am.

    P.U.B.A.R. (Pumped up beyond all recognition),
    Dave

DAWGS win.  DAWGS win.  DAWGS win.

 

10 Responses

  1. Paul

    October 29, 2005 7:44 pm, Reply

    What a disgrace! If we don’t hire someone to make proper play-calls, I’m signing off on this team until we hire a new coach! Talk about NO BALLS!
    RICHT: “Duh..Lets run the same draw four more times following repeated failure.”
    Thanks UGA! My sportsbook.com bet paid off!! As always, you choked!

  2. Chops

    October 30, 2005 7:54 am, Reply

    GT talking trash to UGA about football is liking a virgin talking about banging girls…or the DAWGS talking trash to GT about bball. Come on, Buzz. As awful of a big-game coach that Richt is (I was lying about the “steady hand” in the post…Richt is the Bobby Cox of college football), I’d still take him over Chan Gailey in any situation. Put together a few winning seasons or back-to-back defeats of the DAWGS and then speak up. Otherwise we’ll just keep scratching you off our bawls w/ our muthafuckin paws.

  3. Joe H

    October 31, 2005 1:07 pm, Reply

    Just for the record: The offical O/U for jeans shorts worn by Gator fans was set at 45 by experts Bryan Barkley and Tom Kessler on Saturday morning. With the lock-of-the-week, we all took the over and were delighted to cash in when Jean Short sightings easily topped 70.
    The O/U for overhearing Gator fans say, “I don’t understand that cheer about the jean shorts…what’s wrong with jean shorts?” was set at 5, and was beaten with at least 8 of these comments overheard.
    Go Dawgs…go you Debonaire Dawgs.

  4. Buzz

    October 31, 2005 1:32 pm, Reply

    BSN, never forget that only by the good fortune of having Herschel Walker do your precious Bulldogs have a national championship. You can start talking trash about GT football when you have more national championships than GT does (currently at 4).

  5. AyeCarumba

    October 31, 2005 6:32 pm, Reply

    That’s some good info to have, Buzz! Now everybody knows that the number of GT National Championships is equal to the number of attractive girls enrolled at Tech. If that were the case with UGA, the Dawgs would have to have one every year since the dawn of time.

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