Friday Night Parting Shot: Miss Teen South Carolina Caitlin Upton

Lauren Caitlin UptonDoes anyone know who won this year’s Miss Teen USA pageant?

Didn’t think so.

But you do know who came in 4th thanks to her brilliantly stupid flub that has now been seen by tens of millions around the world and will forever make ending sentences with “such as” funny to us, you know, like, such as.

And while 18-year-old Miss Teen South Carolina Caitlin Upton has endured a week of ridicule that most people won’t experience in a lifetime, it will likely be Upton who will be getting the last laugh if she’s, uh, smart enough to capitalize on her moment in the spotlight. Just look at former pageant chicks and all around female role models Danielle Lloyd, Tara Conner and WCP fave Katie Rees. Each girl demonstrated that you don’t have to be a rocket scientist, or even know where The Iraq is, to make it in today’s world. Nope, all you have to do is be young, hot and do things like kiss girls, simulate sex acts, shag judges, pose for Playboy and maybe even snort a little gak to make a name for yourself and a little cash along the way.

So cheer up Caitlin Upton. Being smart is overrated, and what the people in South Africa, The Iraq and Asian countries need right now are not maps to look at but more hot pageant chicks, and that is where you can help out starting with more photos after the jump.



One Response

  1. Kid Dynamite

    September 2, 2007 7:42 pm, Reply

    i realized that by U.S. Americans she just meant NOT African American, Indian American, Asian American, Italian American or any other kind of American.. You know – U.S. Americans… like the ones on the Mayflower.
    The Iraq… fantastic stuff… it’s as if she had a list of talking points, and just nailed them off one by one.. where the fuck was DARFUR !?!??!!

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