A source* of ours at NBC studios in Burbank emailed us a bit of Jay Leno’s monologue planned for tonight. Thought we’d pass it on…
"What’s with poker these days? It’s everywhere. And especially in Hollywood. You have
Lucky You starring Drew Barrymore and Eric Bana coming out in April 2006. The new Bond film has 007 playing Texas Hold’em instead of Baccarat and get this, just today it was announced that two new movies are coming out, both with the word "Poker" in the title — Poker Night and The Poker Club.
I mean what’s next?
A new JK Rowlings film shot at a hip Las Vegas casino called Harry Poker and the Wizard of Palms.
[if audience not laughing repeat "Harry . . . Palms" two or three times gesturing with your palms. Remind audience there’s a casino in Vegas called the Palms. DO NOT SAY "Do you get it?" while gesturing unless absolutely necessary.]
Speaking of the movie Poker Night. One of its stars Hayden Christensen will also star in a new movie with the beautiful Jessica Alba. Jessica plays his wife in the film and get this . . . Hayden’s character becomes paralyzed. Hey Kevin, what’s the working title for this film again? Oh yeh, that’s right . . . Misery 2.
Hey are you hearing about this rioting in France? It’s getting crazy over there. And it’s only getting worse, because as the French fight among themselves, there’s growing confusion as to who exactly they’re suppose to surrender to.
[Do not follow up joke with "Fucking Pussies" comment like during rehearsal]
Alright, so we have a great show lined up tonight . . . "
Pics of Jessica Alba on the Tonight Show after the jump . . .
(*no such person exists)