Intern with Poker Site, Marry a Costa Rican, Get Herpes

Stephaniem261850110_1Meet Stephanie. She’s 18, 5’0 tall, weighs a buck ten and could be your “wife” if you land one of the three Absolute Poker internships spots they’re offering this summer at their headquarters in Costa Rica. Job duties consist of assisting with new marketing campaigns and giving input on game module look, and you’ll be compensated with roundtrip airfare, lodging, a stipend for food (and hookers), spending cash (for hookers) and opportunity for full-time employment at the end of the internship.

What do you have to do to secure your position? First download their software, register for a qualifying tournament and make the final table. Then and only then do you get to send your resume in for review. If you win the tourney outright, congrats the internship is automatically yours. No review is necessary. For the remaining 8 finalists, you get a phone interview for a shot at the remaining two spots.

So what do you have to do to secure your Costa Rican “wife”? Even simpler, visit any of the numerous websites that offer such services.

When asked about why the application process is this way, Absolute Poker said:

“We are an online poker company, and knowledge of the product in any business is essential. We hope that by getting the best poker players, we will also get the best feedback about our product.”

When asked what Costa Rica is like and how are the women, Absolute Poker answered both questions the same:

“Beautiful, warm, and inexpensive.”

When Wicked Chops Poker was asked why these beautiful, warm women were so inexpensive, they referred to the World Heath Organization’s report that said, in some parts of Costa Rica, 40% of the women ages 15-19 have genital herpes.

For more on the poker internship, visit

For more on genital herpes, visit


2 Responses

  1. ACH

    January 27, 2006 11:39 am, Reply

    absolute poker and genital herpes have equally great names if you change out the words. for example, absolute herpes…or genital poker. so if you play genital poker with a costa rican do you get absolute herpes?

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