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LAPT

Don’t Drink the Water, Play Poker in Mexico


Gaby_ramirez_naked 
Gaby Ramirez is possibly the hottest model to ever come out of Mexico. Not that there's a ton of options. But regardless, she's one hot taco. Wow that was a bad joke. View more (NSFW) pics here.

As Dr. Pauly first reported here, something foul was going on at the LAPT Nuevo Vallarta in Mexico this weekend and it didn't have anything to do with digestive issues after eating food there, although for players caught up in the mix, it probably left a similar feeling in their collective stomachs.

While the exact reasons have yet to trickle out, the basic gist is late during Day 1 play, Mexican gaming officials made an unexpected decision to revoke the LAPT's gaming license. Play was suspended and eventually canceled.

In related news, just adding "Mexican" before any combination of words makes it sound way shadier, doesn't it? Mexican gaming officials. Mexican pharmaceutical doctors. Mexican birthday cake.

Anyway, below is the LAPT's official statement (blah blah blah). Even better, read Dr. Pauly's recap and explanation of how "the fix was in" here.

The Latin American Poker Tour (LAPT) confirms that it is cancelling the poker tournament in Nuevo Vallarta, Mexico, due to an indefinite suspension served on one of its local partners. The LAPT states it has cooperated fully and in good faith with the requirements outlined by the Mexican government. The LAPT respects and abides by local regulations in each market. LAPT's partner in Mexico obtained a formal ruling from the Mexican Ministry of the Interior (SEGOB) allowing the event to take place. As the LAPT compiled with every rule stipulated by the Code of the Mexican Federal Law of Games and Raffles, the reasons for suspension are being reviewed by lawyers of all parties.

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No-Namer from the Netherlands Wins LAPT Rio


Poker player Julien Nuijten wins LAPT Rio, Raica Oliveira wins hottest model who dated a trannie lovin soccer playerJulien Nuijten, a 19-year-old total relative unknown from Amsterdam, Holland, has won the first event of the Latin American Poker Tour, held in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil.

Nuijten, who reportedly played the $2,500 buy-in poker tournament on a whim, started final table play as the chip leader and commanded his way to the title and $222,940 payday, which should be enough to buy him some sweet clogs, a field of tulips and loads of hash back home. And maybe a windmill or two. According to the PokerStars folks, Nuijten is a high-stakes poker player online and is a former Magic: The Gathering world champion, thus joining the ranks of fantasy wizard geeks turned cardtossers like David Williams, Noah Boeken, Dario Minieri, Eric "Efro" Froelich and Adam Levy.

Finishing in second for $117,750 was Russian-American Vitaly Kovyazin, who isn’t a cab driver like we had assumed earlier but we were right that he is from Brooklyn where he is a "construction manager." So we probably got the Red Mafia part correct too. Which means we’ll shut up now.

Alex Brenes, the brother of the insufferably annoying Humberto Brenes, finished fourth, earning $62,800.

The results from the final nine below:

1st — Julien Nuijten (Holland) — $223,000
2nd — Vitaly Kovyazin (United States) — $117,750
3rd — Nikolai Senniger (Germany) — $86,350
4th — Alex Brenes (Costa Rica) — $62,800
5th — Oliver Kugler (Germany) — $47,100
6th — Eduardo Henriques (Brazil) — $31,400
7th — Rafael Pardo (Colombia)  — $23,500
8th — Juan Carlos Burguillos (Venezuela) — $15,700
9th — Severin Walser (Switzerland) — $11,775

The next LAPT event is in San Jose, Costa Rica, scheduled for May 22-24.

Gratuitous Brazilian supermodel above is Raica Oliveira, who famously dated soccer star Ronaldo before he was into the whole transvestite hookers thing See lots more of Raica here.

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Latin American Poker Tour Rio Starts Mañana


Adriana Lima is from Brazil where the LAPT Rio poker tournament is being heldThe country that has given us super-smoking hot supermodels like Adriana Lima and paved the way for girls everywhere to painfully have hot wax poured all over their fagina area and pretty much every square inch nearby except for a tiny strip up front then ripped away, solely for our benefit, is set to host the first stop of the Latin American Poker Tour.

The $2,500 buy-in No-Limit Hold’em poker tournament is being held May 3-5 at the Intercontinental Hotel in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, and on hand are an expected 300 runners including a host of South of the Border and US American poker pros including Brazilian Andre Akkari, 2004 WSOP champ Greg Raymer, 2003 WSOP Champ Chris Moneymaker, Victor Ramdin, Isabelle Mercier, a woman, Vanessa Rousso, a woman who went to Duke where she studied at Duke, Chad Brown, Gavin Griffin and the insufferably annoying Humberto Brenes.

We assume Federal, our favorite assassin-looking Brazilian friend, will be there as well.

We were going to post a promotional video for the LAPT Rio we found over at the blog FOWCP Maridu writes but the embed didn’t quite work, so in lieu click here for another video we found from Brazil. Tad NSFW but it’s the weekend so click away.

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