The 2014 WSOP Main Event Final Table Looks Like An Urban Outfitters Ad


Here’s your November Nine…

If you’re into 20-ish youthful looking white guys, this 2014 WSOP Main Event final table is for you!

The 2014 WSOP Main Event played down to the November Nine on Monday. The headliner? Mark Newhouse.

Newhouse (or “Stiles” as everyone will eventually call him) you may remember made the November Nine last year, busting ninth. We’re not into hyperbole, but what Newhouse has done is genuinely impressive. Newhouse’s feat is the most impressive accomplishment in poker since two-time Main Event champ Dennis Phillips won back-to-back Main Event titles.

Newhouse, 29, will enter final table play in much better shape than last year, stacked third overall with 26,000,000. He trails overall chip leader Joran Van Der Sloot Jorryt van Hoof, 31, of the Netherlands with 38,375,000. Jorryt is from Eindhoven, which if you’re a true American and watched Band of Brothers, then you know that THIS WILL HAPPEN in the streets of Eindhoven if he wins. Can anyone say “van Hoof Effect”?

In third overall is Felix Stephensen, 23, of Norway (though now living in London). Felix has 32,775,000 in chips. He has $22,118 in career live tournament earnings. 

In fourth overall is Andoni Larrabe of Spain (though also now living in London). The 22 year-old has $341,266 in career live earnings and is stacked at 22,550,000.

Dan Sindelar from Las Vegas is fifth overall with 21,200,000. The 30 year-old has $527,779 in career live earnings. 

In sixth overall is William Pappaconstantinou, or “Billy Pappas,” the 29 year-old World Foosball champion and inventor of the Pappaconstantinou Continuum. Pappaconstantinou is stacked at 17,500,000.

Think we’re done with 20-something white guys? NOT. EVEN. CLOSE. BUB.

In seventh overall is William Tonking with 15,050,000. If Chris Berman replaced Norman Chad in the broadcast booth for the final table, he’d surely lamely nickname this guy William “Gulf of” Tonking. Anyway, the 27 year-old from New Jersey has $93,306 in live tournament earnings. 

Bringing up the rear are two non-U.S. Americans. In eighth is Sweden’s Martin Jacobson, 27. Martin, who was the Day 1A chip leader, is clearly trying to earn our perpetual spite. He’s stacked at 14,900,000. Jacobson has over $1.2M in career live earnings.

The final table short-stack is sufficiently feisty/Brazilian Bruno Politano with 12,125,000. Bruno, 31, plays poker as a hobby but still has $110,054 in career live earnings. As far as hobbies go, poker > jig saw puzzles. 

Our Good, Bad, Meh for Poker post will be coming in the next few days.

Get a full recap here.



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